And the Bride Had a Nervous Breakdown

This morning as my alarm blasted off at six a.m, the first thought in my mind was that in exactly three months, I will marry my Italian fiance in Stockholm. In a wedding planned entirely from London. And absolutely NOTHING IS READY.

If you run into me on the street these days, please don't get alarmed at those enormous black rings under my eyes. I promise I am not turning into a panda. This is simply the face of a woman who's getting married in three months and is constantly losing sleep worrying "if everything will be ready in time, and what if it rains? What if our Italian guests get lost on the way to the venue? What if my sister won't be able to find a babysitter...or won't want to bring her baby? What if David has a nervous breakdown? What if..."

I bet you can sense where this is going. And before you start any attempts to reassure me with comments such as, "don't worry, it will all be fine" or, "I'm sure your wedding will be amazing", please keep in mind that today is 14 March and




(although I'd still appreciate the aforementioned reassurance attempts. Just so you know.)

I know that at first glance it may not look as dire as I claim it is, because as of now:

Hair - check

Makeup - check

Officiant - check

Venue - check

Dress - check

Photographer - check

Invitations - on their way

But on the flip side:

Catering - no

Official documents - no

Rings - no

David's suit - no

Talking to my mother, if anything, speeds up my already-imminent heart attack. Here are a few of the "helpful" things she's said so far (and my replies):

"You have to get the catering sorted, dear. What if people show up and there's no food?"
We'll just have to pick some twigs and leaves from the garden then, Mum.

"But who cares about pretty invitations? People are going to throw them away anyway."
Hmm, maybe we should just print directly on bin liners?

"Do you absolutely have to have Italian food? What about a Russian-Italian fusion?"
Yeah, I'm sure there's a catering place that does that. The Russian Bride And Italian Groom Caterers of Stockholm. By the way, that sounds DELICIOUS.

"Vegetarian? But what are people going to EAT??"
 I'll go with that twigs and leaves idea again on this one.

"Are you sure that David will still want to go through with this?"
Thanks, Mum. Just..thanks.

I'm sure that Olivia Palermo and Lauren Conrad's mothers don't make them deal with this.

Jokes aside, my mother, sister and maid of honour are a huge help - today, my mum actually said, "we need everything to look beautiful, because we have such a gorgeous bride!" (aaawww). Without them, I would be crying into a bottle of Chardonnay at this very moment. My husband-to-be, on the other hand, is surprisingly chill about it. He's the one that has no suit and no wedding rings, yet his supreme chill-out attitude is impressive. I wish I could find a way to master that all-Italian "relax, we'll get to it" art of keeping it supremely cool. But I guess they don't call it "bridezilla" for nothing. Now, where did I put that Chardonnay?

pic from Pinterest


  1. You're fine. Absolutely fine. :) I think the documents and catering are the only "worries" at this point. Rings are easy and so are suits. If it helps, I planned my wedding in six weeks (around the "you're pretty far along with twins, so you can't travel after [this date]" direction for my sister). Mind you, to be fair, we had a super small event. But still - it's doable, and you're fine. Tonnes of time. :)

    Good luck, lady! I can't wait to read your updates. :)

  2. You work in fashion, so you also know that regardless how much people stress it always works out somehow amazingly. The show always go on. Just don't compare your Mum to Lauren Conrad's because that little teeny queen has nothing on you so I bet her Mum has nothing on yours regardless of who asks more silly questions. You will be fine and for the time being - everybody loves a Panda!!

  3. Your marriage sounds so exciting! :)) Please take a lot of pictures!
    When you was younger how did you imagine it?

  4. Mamma mia sono emozionata IO per il TUO matrimonio!

    1. aaaww grazie <3 sto avendo un esaurimento nervoso!

  5. You will get there. I remember being very similar to you with the day fast approaching and so much still to do. Can't wait to see pictures!


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